Facebook – the world’s biggest addiction next to tobacco, alcohol, porn and McDonalds; the place you can visit when in real life your friends are non-existent; your face isn’t tagged and commented on by hundreds of people; your dog doesn’t have a fan page and people don’t ‘like’ what you say.

Facebook, the employer’s nemesis, parents’ worst nightmare, relationship history archive and most often, the only reason why you’re in touch with about 400 hundred people you wouldn’t speak to on the street, let alone have a real time unwanted instant chat which by law begins with ‘hey you’.
Well fear not, facebook self-harmers, now you can get harassed on the move! Just make sure you’re available to chat as you catch the bus, make the tea, go to the hairdresser, stack up on some sweat-shop goodies @ Primani – wherever you are and whatever you’re doing, do it with a chorus of ‘hey you’ in your pocket.
WHY the doubt/dread/fear/animosity, I ask myself? Perhaps it’s because anyone I actually want to talk to knows where I live, will have my mobile number, email address, work email and skype info and (God forbid…) will actually spend time with me in real life, whereas facebook is for all the people who quite simply don’t.

So yes, this is a blog to express how I simply cannot wait for facebook to further distort the line between real life and electronic life by bringing fake profiles even closer. And for the record, if you haven’t met someone in real life, they are not your best friend or lover, and if they try and forge that relationship electronically, particularly if through continued ‘hey you’ pings, then beware! You’ve been warned.
